Hello there friend!
Chances are, you are busy with life, work, and now you’re getting married! While it’s so so exciting, it can also be daunting, as you embark on planning the biggest party of your life with all the traditions and ceremony that go with it.
If you are like me, one of your biggest goals for your wedding is that it’s as stress-free as possible for you and your family and friends. You want to be in the moment, and enjoy the day and not be stressing over the details coming into place.
Since I have the experience of my own wedding day and many other wedding days I’ve been a part of since then, I’d love to share with you some of the things I’ve learned that can save you a lot of stress on the wedding day, and some of the things that I wish I had done for my own wedding!
1. Be the leading lady
In a lot of ways, weddings are a lot like stage plays. You have your leading lady (you, the bride), your leading man (the groom), the cast (wedding party), and the crew behind the scenes (your vendors). Unlike most plays, everyone doesn’t get to spend months rehearsing, and there’s only one opportunity to get it right—no “take 2”.
There’s a really good reason why there are so few actor/director/producers in the world. It’s because each of those is a BIG JOB, and it’s really hard to do more than one at a time. As a bride, you are producing (organizing), directing everyone, and also the star of the show! It’s a lot of work!
When it comes to the wedding day, I firmly believe that you should JUST be the leading lady and pass off all the other responsibilities to someone else who is very qualified to help you. Just like you wouldn’t expect Scarlett Johanssen to be setting up her own lights, doing her own hair and makeup, and pressing record on the cameras herself, you shouldn’t expect yourself to handle all of the wedding day logistics. That’s suuuuuper stressful.
2. Hire a Coordinator
This is one of those things that I really wish I had done for my wedding. I had one of my aunts helping my mom run the show, but at the end of the day, it was my mom and me handling SO many things that I was stressed about.
I’m a very DIY, handy, organized person, and I thought we could handle it, but I was wrong. I really wished I had prioritized budget for at minimum a day-of coordinator. Most of the stressful weddings I’ve been a part of would have been way less intense with just this one change. Wedding planners are such an asset to your day. If you need recommendations, just send me an email, and I’d be happy to send you a list of my favorite Coeur d’Alene wedding planners to work with.
3. Vet your vendors
Another big stress point at weddings is vendors who don’t do a good job, show up late, or bring their own drama/ego with them to the wedding day.
At the end of the day we are all human, and sparks do fly sometimes, but professionals should deal with difficulty and problems in a way that shield their clients from extra stress and bad experiences. How do you know they will do a good job for you when you’ve never worked with them before?
One way is to rely on referrals from people you trust and good online reviews. I always recommend a phone call, zoom call, or in-person meeting with every vendor before booking. You want to make sure you feel good about them as a person who will be working closely with you and your other vendors on a really important day.
It’s really important that you are inviting humans that you jive with to be a part of your behind-the-scenes team. I wouldn’t recommend going with any vendor just because they are the least expensive option or the best deal. If you get weird, ego-y, or just plain “meh” vibes from a vendor you meet with, then I would suggest you keep looking until you find someone that you feel AMAZING talking to.
4. Have your hair and makeup done professionally
I might be biased about this one because I used to do hair and makeup for weddings, but I really feel like having your hair and makeup done professionally relieves so much stress from your wedding day. Stressing about performing the perfect eyeliner and getting your lashes just right and making your hairstyle last all day is NO FUN.
Make sure to have a trial session before the wedding so you know exactly what you want and that the artist you’ve hired will deliver what you are hoping for. Because they are the first vendor you see in the day, make sure they are someone you really enjoy spending time with and that they will be drama free and on time.
5. Plan for self-care time
The week leading up to your wedding should have some carefully planned time for yourself, to get yourself mentally and physically ready for your wedding. Taking some time to de-stress, go through some beauty routines, and think about the things that are truly meaningful to you.
Because you need some self-care time, I recommend planning to finish every task that you have on your to-do list 3 days before the wedding. Best laid plans, and all that, it’s unlikely that you’ll be able to get EVERYTHING done, but leaving some padding time to deal with the unexpected, the unplanned, and still having a little time to yourself is important for a stress free experience.
6. Be clear about what is most important to you
I recommend that you walk into your wedding day focusing on the people, and the moments that are most important to you. Schedules get off, people are late, things happen, but if you are ready to let the less important things go, they don’t need to affect your wedding bliss. At the end of the day, you are married to the one you love, and that is the most important thing of all.
I hope you’ve found these tips on how to have a stress free wedding day helpful! If you are looking for a wedding photographer who provides a stress-free experience focusing on your meaningful moments, I’d love to chat with you! Just click Contact, and we’ll be right with you.